I FIND it funny when people or companies make claims that “research shows ...” or “recent studies prove ...”.

It varies from whether red meat is bad for you to health benefits of milk, alcohol, white bread, sugar, salt etc.

If a certain claim is made against something, then other studies commissioned by the meat, dairy industry etc will release a study to say that it is all good for you, in moderation of course.

I particularly like the research that states that two glasses of beer or red wine on a daily basis are good for you. My point is that it is most likely the people who commission the study usually get the result they want.

For instance, John Howard wants nuclear power, so a hand-picked committee is put together to come up with the appropriate result.

If you don’t drink milk, your bones will snap in half, and eating certain red meat will improve your heart.

Last week a study was released that warmed my heart. It stated that most women, no matter how attractive, found the average guy more appealing than the stunningly handsome.

Now it is obvious to me that the person behind that research was an average guy.

If I commissioned a study about that particular topic, maybe, just maybe, research would show that ugly was in, and that women of all shapes and sizes preferred the not-so-handsome guys whose loving mothers had to tie pork sausages around their necks so the dog would play with them.

Research would show that women appreciated the fact that these guys wouldn’t deteriorate as they aged, because it had already happened.

SMACKING kids has certainly been in the spotlight lately, and there has been plenty of research commissioned to prove that kids shouldn’t be disciplined physically.

Call me a right winger or whatever you like, but I really do believe that a lack of discipline at home and school is the root of a lot of issues. I know plenty won’t agree with me, but maybe local police guru Anne Macdonald would.

I noticed her recent comments about a lack of respect for police, and I think it is too much of a coincidence that the way behaviour has deteriorated over the years nearly parallels the changing views on disciplining children.

There is plenty of research to back the view that children should not be punished physically, but I view that in the same league as the milk and meat surveys.

Research like this has led to supermarkets advertising that there will be no smacking on the premises. I bet their lolly aisle is popular.

I treated our kids’ discipline in a similar way to how my brother and I were treated. As far as my brushes with my father’s hand, there weren’t many but they all made an impression.

But things ran my way on at least a couple of occasions back then. Once when Dad was trying to pluck a turkey for Christmas in 40-degree heat, I kept doing drive-bys on my scooter.

He warned me twice about getting too close, but I gave it one more go and ran over his toe with the front wheel He never got me that day because I legged it up to my mother and hid behind her skirt until he calmed down.

The other time I was playing up at the top of the stairs and he gave me a whack, and I took a dive down the steps bellowing like he had thrown me down headfirst.

Of course, Mum came out and Dad spent the next 10 minutes defending himself.

My clearest memory of discipline in our house was my dear old dad trying to fix the mower, with an audience of his two boys and the dog. The dog kept sticking its nose in, so on the third warning it got a clip over the ear, which upset my brother, so he jumped up and down on his new schoolbag.

Then he copped it, which I enjoyed immensely. There were a few more but the thing was, we knew that if we crossed the line there would be something coming our way, or at least the threat of it, and I think that has stayed with us in life, as with our kids.

I am not saying any of us were or are angels, but we are aware of what is right and wrong, and I didn’t have to commission a study to work that out.