In the famous words of Pauline, “please explain?”.

Our new fearless leader, Kevin 07, spent all that taxpayer money on getting together some smart people and, of course, the obligatory celebrities from around the country to nut out what to do for the future.

Now I didn’t read what all the items were they discussed but I am truly hoping that putting extra tax on pre-mix drinks to curb binge drinking and its associated problems wasn’t Hugh Jackman’s or Cate Blanchette’s idea.

For that matter, I kind of hope it wasn’t anyone’s at the futures forum and, like most ridiculous decisions, was instigated by a Sir Humphrey-type bureaucrat (ABC’s Yes Minister), because that would be what I would expect.

In last week’s press it was declared that the higher tax hadn’t worked.

Well, hello! Of course it hasn’t worked. Even a low double figure IQer like me could have told them that, for free.

Just the other day I was on my cycle ride around Quad Park.

It was the morning after Powderfinger performed at Lake Kawana and, as usual, there were empty drink containers strewn around the area.

Yes, there were less alco-pops – as Kev loves to call them – a lot less than normal, in fact.

But I saw something I have never seen before – empty white wine bottles – of the $9-$10 variety – lying in the gutters.

That doesn’t surprise me. Nor does seeing empty spirit bottles and casks – all with higher alcohol content than the fizzy drinks that they put the tax up on.

There were also more empties of imported heavy beers lying around.

So what will the government do now, increase the tax on all alcohol or admit that maybe they were a bit naïve when they rushed the idea through?

But they shouldn’t feel alone. Their country cousins at state level have had a crack too – and again I don’t know where they got their advice from.

They are introducing a levy on pubs and clubs on late trading hours which, in my mind, sounded reasonable until I saw how they did it.

If you want to trade after midnight, you have to pay for either a 3am licence or a 5am one, depending on where it is.

In my mind if a pub used to trade until 1am, like a lot do, but they have to pay a fee that means they can trade till 3am, what do you reckon they will do?

Probably stay open and try to recoup the levy and, in fact, may make the problem worse.

Again I ask, who do the geniuses that come up with these ideas talk to?

Now I understand all parties are trying to do something to curb violence and alcoholism, and I am all for that.

But if they are going to keep making knee-jerk reactions to everything, why stop at alcohol?

Why not slap a violence tax on any computer game that has violence in it, because they have to be contributing to the problems?

DVDs and box office movies could cop a violence tax as well, and music video clips shouldn’t miss out as well.

But don’t stop there. What about boxercise, boot camps and any gym that has hand-to-hand combat drills?

May as well tax them as well because it may be minutely possible that they are muddying the clarity between fact and fiction.

Of course, most of what I am writing is, in fact, fiction with the only winner being the government if they taxed everything involving violence or alcohol.

Surely the answer is clear. The judicial system is sadly in need of a revamp to make sure the punishment fits the crime.

Every day in the news there are people desperately disappointed with sentences administered by our courts, whatever the crime.

And usually, on those same pages, there is a photo of some goose leaving court giving the finger to the media and showing no remorse whatsoever.

I am all for responsible service and distribution of alcohol, and the punishment of venues and alcohol companies if they breach.

But haven’t we all got to start exercising some common sense in the court room and expect common decency from each other.

Surely someone told Kevin that in their talkfest in Canberra.