I had a brilliant idea the other day. My 14-year-old Max and I are attempting to do up a 1975 Datsun 120Y.

It needs some panels and a couple of years' work, but I think it’s going to be good for both of us.

As I left Zinc 96 after my breakfast shift, I decided to go to the school and sign Max out for a fictitious orthodontist appointment.

Once I had extracted the bewildered teenager, I revealed all.

“We are going to Gympie wreckers to look for parts”, I said. As usual, Max’s reply was, “sweet”.

We drove to Gympie, located the wreckers, and started hunting for a duplicate 120Y.

“I think there might be one up in that back corner by the pine tree," said Darren the wrecking warrior. Off Max and I went, up the hill through the skeletal remains of family autos large and small.

Suddenly, there it was, a 1975 mustard-coloured Datsun 120Y. I bought the whole thing for just over $100.

From there we went to the Gold Nugget and scoffed our all-day breakfast... for lunch. I got him back for school just in time for the final bell, and football training.

Oh the embarrassment
Sixteen-year-old Stella was backstage at her high school production showcase.

It was to be performed at the Caloundra Civic Centre.

Both she and her friend Emma were wearing those headset microphones like Madonna does.

As she was backstage, in the darkness, she was completely unaware that her microphone was “live”.

My beautiful daughter turned to her friend, and said, at about 150 watts to the seated audience..........“I so gotta pee."

Bli Bli bats
As you come south down the north coast highway, and pass the Parklands exit, just before the Bli Bli off ramp, make sure you look left and skyward.

The reason being, it is the daytime resting place for thousands of fruit bats hanging from every branch as though they were some form of black and tan fruit.

If you look very closely, I swear you can see the tiny little faces of Germaine Greer and Ita Buttrose.

My good friend Ian
My on-air partner, Ian Calder, and I have vowed never to touch a circular saw.

The reason being, that we are definitely NOT home handymen.

No matter what we touch in our respective houses, you can bet we will have to call a professional in to fix up our DIY disasters. I have proof.

My friend Ian went to Bunnings and bought a ladder so that he could paint the gable above his front door.

He set up the ladder and stood precariously at roof height holding a Blue Ribbon ice-cream container filled with oil-based tan paint.

The ladder slipped two complete rungs, container went skyward and back on to Ian, and all over the pavers in front of his door.

It was back to Bunnings for many bottles of mineral turpentine, not for the pavers, but to wash his hair with.

Bamboo Garden
I found a fantastic “hole in the wall” Chinese restaurant.

It’s right next to Velvet Waters Theatre Restaurant, on Bulcock Street, Caloundra. The front is illuminated by one fluoro sign.

There are no colours to speak of behind the sliding door. Once you go round past the register, you’ll find no more than seven tables.

There is no Chinese music playing through in-house speakers, and strangely enough, the fact that there is no atmosphere, adds to the atmosphere.

It is run by a husband-and-wife team, and the food is lovely. I had king prawns in black bean sauce. Get there early... there’s not many tables.

Education policy
Who would have thought, Kevin Rudd’s education revolutionis exactly the same as John Howard’s education revolution.

It just goes to prove, whether they’ve got bushy eyebrows and glasses or they look like Cartman from South Park, they’re all the bloody same.