I think I’m a good father to my children but I’m not really sure.

When any of them compete, the last thing I always say to them is: “Don’t come home unless you win!”

Now 16-year-old Stella was given clear instructions when she left for the national Stillwater Lifesaving Championships at the Caboolture Aquatic Centre on the weekend, but did she follow my orders to the letter?

No! I did go down on the Sunday to watch her compete and was personally convinced that she had taken out the Australian title in the rope throw and patient retrieve with a magnificent effort in her heat. To give her dues, it was the first time she had competed.

Being the perfect father, I left straight after her race and came home.

Sometime later the phone rang and it was Stella.

“Dad,” she said, somewhat excitedly, “I won the bronze at the Australian Championships.”

I responded: “That’s great darling, but what did I tell you?”

She replied: “I know, I know, don’t come home unless you win!”

“Well,” I continued, “you had better find somewhere to stay in Morayfield for a while.”

The old Maroochy River Bridge

Now that the new bridge is completely finished and looks terrific, with its glass panels and modern lighting, all I find myself doing as I drive to work is looking at the work progressing on the old bridge.

My question is: “Is it going to look exactly the same as the new bridge when it’s finished?”

“I hope so, but it’s clearly way lower than the new structure. If I were a bridge decorator with a touch of the Dorothys, I’d make them just like Mary-Kate and Ashley.

Exact in every way, same thickened glass, same light fittings and with exactly the same railings, with one bridge just a little skinnier than the other.

Little Mexico gutted

Please tell me it’s not true, please tell me my eyes are deceiving me and that this can’t be happening.

I drove through Coolum the other night and I thought I saw my favourite Mexican restaurant, Little Mexico, being gutted.

If there is a God, they will be re-furbishing it and re-painting and putting new tables and tiles in so that I can still enjoy my fortnightly seafood burrito, but if this is not the case and it turns out to be closing down, believe you me, I will make sure somebody pays a heavy price for destroying what I consider to be Sunshine Coast heritage. Do you hear me?

Benny Pike beware

My long-term media associate Benny (the battling boxer) Pike didn’t quite see me sitting in the corner of the Coffee Club at Coolum Beach when he wandered in at dinner time.

I sort of half-waved but got no response. You see, Benny’s eyes were firmly fixed on the cake display and he didn’t disappoint, leaving with a bag full of white chocolate and macadamia nut cookies.

Be careful, Benny. Take it from someone who knows – that stuff will give you a heart attack.

The most amazing guest

I interviewed an incredible man the other day on Zinc 96.

His name was Peter William Rowe and what was amazing about him was that for 30 years of his life, because he is affected by Down syndrome, he was unable to speak.

His parents were told by the doctors when he was born to “just take him home and love him”. No one believed he had any intellectual capability at all because he was speechless.

That was until he met a speech therapist who introduced him to facilitated communication in the shape of a cardboard keyboard alphabet.

During all those years of silence, Peter was watching Sesame Street and learning the letters and looking over the shoulders of his brothers while they were doing their homework and was absorbing everything.

I asked him if he remembered the first word he ever spelt out. “Oh yes,” he said, pointing to the letters. “I remember crying as I said, ‘Mum, I can speak’.”

Peter’s art exhibition runs from the January 30 to February 6 at the Maroochy Library.