Kym and the kids arrived home just a little late and interestingly enough parked halfway up a hill, just down from the house.

The kids came running yelling, “We’ve got a flat tyre, we’ve got a flat tyre” as if it was something sought-after, something special that sets you apart from the rest.

Forget all you also-rans, WE have a flat tyre.

I walked out in the drizzle and asked, “How long have you had a flat tyre?”

“Five kilometres ago,” she said. I looked at the mangled smoking rubbery mess that used to be the back wheel and said “You know you can just pull over and call someone.”

“It was getting dark and I needed to get everyone home. Have I damaged the axle or anything?” was her first question. Luckily she hadn’t damaged the rim or the axle.

After replacing the tyre I drove to the shop to get myself a Coke Zero which has been specifically prescribed for me by the heart specialist.

Naturally I started a conversation about my wife and the now famous flat tyre.

“Don’t speak to me about wives and flat tyres,” said Chris the store owner.

“My wife drove on a flat tyre yesterday for 10 minutes straight.”

We both exclaimed “Women, you can’t live with them and you can’t live without them.”

It’s a dog’s life
While hurtling down the Bruce Highway, heading to Forest Glen for school pick-up the other day I was passed at 100kmh by a guy on a gold Kawasaki motorbike.

There is nothing out of the ordinary about that except when he pulled in front of me, there was a little brown and white fox terrier in a motorbike pet pack staring back at me with that “What the hell am I doing here?” look on his face.

Now if it was me, I don’t think I could handle going forwards at 100kmh while looking backwards trying to work out where I’m going to, from where I’ve just been. That wasn’t the funniest bit though. It was the fact that the little fellow was wearing a helmet that really amused me...(Just kidding).

Clippers for comment
Hot on the heels of last week’s story about my family using my hair clippers on the dogs, comes an express delivery to Zinc 96 of a Vidal Sassoon innovative intelligent individual i-clip hair clippers for men.

The note read “Jamie, had a great laugh at your expense when reading your column this morning, sorry about that, leave the Breville clippers to Maggie and Milo, regards, Margi Douglas” PS, would you mind mentioning the Coolum Charity Ball on Saturday, July 5 at 7pm. $170 includes dinner, drinks, entertainment and local transport home. Tickets available from
www.coolum.com.au/coolumcharityball.

Margi, for a set a hair clippers, I would have given you the front page.

Kevin Rudd
Oh the generosity of our government! With Kevin giving $35 million and the Victorian government giving $35 million, Mr Toyota is a very happy man, ready to produce his new hybrid car in Australia. Half electric / half petrol.

For $70 million I could come up with a hybrid idea or two. What about the 240 Voltswagon? I know … perhaps I should go back to working in the theatre restaurant.

State of Origin
I’ve been on holidays from radio this week, staying out in the country by myself.

I invited the boys up to watch State of Origin with me. Kym’s comment was, “Why don’t you have them all?”. “My pleasure” was my response.

So an overnight farm stay it was for me and the kids. Disaster struck though at 6.30pm as I realised it wasn’t on Austar until 10.30pm that night and there was no TV.

The only option for me and the boys to see the State of Origin was to go to the lounge bar at the Railway Hotel in Imbil. Stella and Poppy decided to stay home.

Naturally, it didn’t look too good for me when their Mum rang to check on the kids and Stella said and I quote “We are here on our own and Dad’s taken the boys to the pub to watch the football”………oops.