And so we have officially entered what I like to call ... the no sport zone. Dum da daaaaaaaa.

Seriously.

With the end of the football season (and what a disappointment those games were), and with another month or so until the summer sports begin in earnest, there isn’t a lot going on in sport-land.

And really, who these days cares about any of the other sports which are supposed to fill the void?

Just like I thought. No one.

Which is why, once the hangovers pass and the last of the ticker tape has been swept away, there will be an influx of bleary-eyed men running around the Sunshine Coast.

Yes, yes, the Rugby World Cup is on and most men I know are clinging onto that bandwagon like grim death, but is it really worth staying up until 3am to watch the “world” battle it out, when everyone knows who is going to be in the top four? (Snore).

I think not.

So in the interests of filling the void, I thought I would suggest some new sports to get into.

ROLLER DERBY

Bored with watching skimpily dressed women hit each other with pillows?

(And let’s be honest – who isn’t?)

Then how about watching skimpily dressed women beat the stuffing out of each other while on roller skates?

Seriously.

Roller derby – complete with bad disco outfits and corny names (where else would you find girls voluntarily answering to Von Krusher and Hot Rod Stacy?) – is back.

Girls all over the world (and yes, that includes us in Down Under land) have strapped on their skates, slipped on their sweat bands, found their fluoro leg warmers and hit the rink with a vengeance.

So if you have some spare time and five ladies sitting round with nothing to do, how about setting up your own team and heading down to the Caloundra roller rink?

Unless, of course, you would rather participate in ...

SIMONE and SHANE WARNE BASHING (or, as I like to refer to it, when boguns break up. Again)

Watch this couple serve volley after volley to each other in the press.

Can Shane one-up Simone’s latest heart wrenching admission that he is a bully? How low will Simone go in trying to win the public’s sympathy? Does anyone even care any more?

With a whole divorce settlement to go (and let’s not rule out a surprise reconciliation) and Shane’s new “love of my life” to meet, the former first couple of Australian cricket have plenty of play left in them yet.

If that glamour Aussie sports couple doesn’t do it for you, but you think it might be a sport you could get into, then how about a round of ...

SPOT LLEYTON’S CAREER (Or when boguns get married)

Since getting loved up and sharing his genes around, this former dynamo of Aussie tennis has done a bit of a nose dive off the top players’ circuit.

So get your family and friends together for a round of “Where’s Lleyton now?”

The winner is the first to find a mention of the former world number one that actually has something to do with tennis.

“Our Baby Bliss”, “Cooking with the Champ” and “Our Secret Heartbreak” articles which mention that he is a tennis player don’t count – and photos of Bec, weighed down with enough bling to sink the Titanic, watching her hubby hit some balls, only counts as half a point.

Or you could just go outside and enjoy some of this beautiful October weather we have been gifted with.

If you’re feeling really adventurous, you could even play some real sport yourself. It sure beats watching anything on offer at the moment.