Having most of the things I need, but not enough of the folding stuff for the ones I want, I’m not a big reader of ads, but it’s nice sometimes to browse the classifieds.

In these humble columns, any writer worth his or her salt can find material for not just for an article, but for a book. (Please forgive my obeisance to political correctness.

Why can’t we have a non gender-specific possessive pronoun? Hes, perhaps?)

But back to the classies.

The human condition is never more realistically portrayed than by those who want to sell, buy, move, give, help, hope, share and grieve through the ads, but there are laughs aplenty.

In the Daily’s Found column one day last week was an ad seeking the owner of a “damnation cross boxer”. I presume it was a dog, not an angry pugilist with a good counter-punch.

Talking of man’s best friend, what ever happened to the bitzer?

In my day (no eye rolls, please) most of the neighbourhood dogs were of questionable parentage.

The unattractive and/or aggressive ones were called mongrels, and the rest were affectionately known as bitzers.

These days, we read and hear only of the “cross”, from which I assume that only two breeds are claimed to have been involved in the pooch’s lineage.

That would be highly unlikely in the days when the street was the milieu of the knockabout dog, as opposed to the pampered pet.

A small but significant part of my sex education came from observations on the way to and from school, free love was the go, even in the most unlikely couplings, hence the unpredictability of the resulting litters.

Now I’ve owned a few purebred dogs in my day, including the brainy border collie and the loveable lab, and I’ve been good friends with lots more.

In my experience, though, the bitzer is a lot less trouble than the dog with impeccable bloodlines.

No finicky appetite, resistance to disease, great survival skills, athleticism and very often, intelligence that goes way past mere cleverness.

Out west, of course, they don’t care much about the pedigrees of their working dogs, only their ability and durability.

If they get one with the best attributes of more than one bloodline, eg kelpie/border collie/blue heeler, they have a super dog they wouldn’t part with for any money.

I’ve owned dogs for most of my life but now,sadly, my body corporate forbids this. If I could have one, though, I’d go for a bitzer.