By the time this goes to print it will be game over. Origin One done and dusted. After last year’s game one, I wrote a dubious tribute piece to Darren Lockyer to the tune of Don McLean’s classic American Pie (which I later had all over my face).

The familiar refrain was “he’ll be a fullback ’til the day that he dies”. At the risk of getting death threats from Don, I have ripped off his other classic, Vincent – or better known as Starry, Starry Night.

All I can say is, I hope I can glance over this column today without having to look through the gloom of the Maroons being one down. You’ll see a reference to Locky kicking for goal. Of course, Johnathan Thurston is usually the designated kicker, but who knows what might happen?

Darren: Scary, Scary Sight (Ode to an Ankle) Scary, scary sight Strap your ankle black and blue and play Get out some magic spray Throw off the icepack and forget the toll.

Shake off your ills Stretch the knees and do the drills You have to please, we need our thrills In doesn’t matter that you can hardly stand.

Next verse: Now you know the grand plan Origin’s not fair game for me If you don’t play for the gallery Oh how you’ll suffer, you can’t outrun the referee. The selectors would not listen, they had orders from Big Mal Perhaps…after eighty minutes all will be well.

Next verse: Scary, scary sight Flaring tendons that brightly swell Purplish bruising makes running hell Reflected in Darren’s cries so blue But play he must do Morning headlines scream his name For Maroon fans the game would not be the same Without a team guided by Locky’s croaky commands

Next verse: How I hope you get the upper hand Not struggling on with injury And howling is some player purgat’ry Not like how you hoped it’d be But the Blues are not listening, they want to smash your foot to gel Perhaps in Origin Two we might have to turn to Jason Smith for a spell.

Next verse: But Mal could not but trust you Even as your ankle swelling grew And with a penalty and the try line in sight Oh what a Scary, Scary Sight (On that Starry, Starry Night) You lining up the ball for two as the Broncos often do My only hope is Darren, The Maroons were never meant to have a kicker with as wobbly a boot as you.

Next verse: Ignore the hamstrings that you’ll get The rugged hits and bloody noses Sinews torn, you still have to come up smelling roses… A try to crush and break them as the final whistle blows Last verse: Now I hope you’re not too impeded.

But what a crying shame it might be Another sprain will be a total calamity But you can’t be hurtin’ as much as Billy and Matty must be They could not get Des Morris to listen If we lose round one he’s as good as road kill Perhaps they should give you and Des both a pill...

Scary, scary sight……